I know what you’re thinking… “Great, just what we need. Another Sims.” And you’re right.

Back before Electronic Arts controlled The Sims franchise, it was just little Maxis, and they developed good software about building cities. Now they have unleashed The Sims on Stage karaoke site. And as a twice-daily singer of karaoke, this sickens me.

Get off the couch and into the pubs, folks. The REAL singing is just down the street at your local karaoke bar or VFW hall. It seems Robert Putnam’s theory on civic engagement even applies to the communication art form of karaoke. A collective withdraw of talented singers… simply looking to tune out, drop acid, and sing to their webcams.

Another sad day. I hate you Electronic Arts.

Any thoughts?

BK was planning a review trip to Bowling Green, Kentucky when he caught wind that the deathly humidity there and the heavy drinking has prevented the sport of karaoke from ever fully developing in this part of the world.

This is unfortunate, because I know a few of our readers hail from that part of the woods. Hang in there guys; maybe someday karaoke will be available at the following places and nights:

• Southern Lanes Friday, Saturday
• City Limits Lounge Wednesday, Friday
• Ricky Beavers karaoke Friday
• Grumpy’s feat. Rick Dunn Friday
• Miss Kitty’s, 3315 Louisville Road, Wednesday
• Betty’s Bar Wednesday, Friday, Saturday
• Dumplin’s Diner in Adairville Karaoke contest every Saturday

Until that time comes, we will keep on praying to the karaoke gods for you folks down in Bowling Green Kentucky suffering from lack of karaoke culture. Time will tell.

This is a travel alert for any karaoke enthusiasts planning a trip to the upcoming International Karaoke Semi-Finals in Beijing:

Get a bullet proof vest, a bomb proof rental car, and use the buddy system (i.e. tell friends where you will be going at ALL times). Folks, it is going to be absolutely friggin dangerous this year - this ain’t no Lucy in the sky with diamonds. This is real life karaoke, and the competition will be stiff and heavily armed. Need I remind ya’all of Sammy “Two Chords” Rachollio’s stabbing last year? That will be nothing compared to the anticipated level of violence at this year’s semi-finals.

It seems that karaoke-related violence has seriously escalated in recent months in the far east (as our previous coverage can attest). The Washington Post is reporting that more than two dozen people will stand trial on accusations that they purchased and stored explosives in a karaoke parlor leveled last month in a blast.

Look, I’m not trying to rain on anyone’s parade here. I’m just saying be safe.

Cardioke is now looking for investors to help spread the word!. I can tell you right now that I won’t be giving any of my 17 million hard-earned dollars to Billy. Cardioke is the wave of the PAST, pal.

The people want to know if Bubba Mac’s in Somers Point does karaoke. If you know, please comment.

This little bar just off the end of Cottman might seem like a drive to the non-believers. But to those smart locals in the know, this place is heaven on a weak (week) night. Nevertheless, I officially nominate it “Philly Bar Most In Need Of Karaoke.”

Your thoughts?

The other day a colleague at work was giving a really good PowerPoint presentation on elbow macaroni. It dawned on me that PowerPoint presentations are nothing more than corporate karaoke. No one is an expert… everyone’s an amateur up there in front of the crowd just reading from a screen. The only difference is that there is no bouncing ball to follow (you’re on your own time), and everyone is sober. What are your thoughts, karaoke fans?

According to Wikipedia, karaoke actually means “empty orchestra.” Learn about this and more at the Wikipedia entry for Karaoke. Very interesting stuff for the intellectual karaoke fiend.